If you’re reading this, it clearly shows you want to be have a likable personality. After all, who doesn’t wish to be liked and appreciated? You’re no exception. It’s good for our ego and social equilibrium. If everyone around us hates us, life will be impossibly rough.
According to evolutionary biologists, we have an instinctive need to feel accepted because it ensures our survival. If we conform and make sure we ‘fit in’ and people like us, then our chances for survival are greater. Makes sense.
In other words, when you have a likable personality, your life becomes rather easier. If not by all, at least by most people around you.
Likable personality: Key factors
Many of us believe that likable people possess certain “natural” and “unteachable” traits, such as stunning looks, good social behaviour and incredible talent. Is that true? Nope. That’s not the case. Innate qualities, such as intelligence and attractiveness, have little to do with being likable; they cannot give you a likable personality.
The fact is that being likable is under your control. It’s a matter of emotional intelligence (EQ), which consists of various personality traits, such as approachability, humility, and kindness.
A TalentSmart research data says: “About 90% of top performers have high EQs. People with high EQs make $29,000 more annually than people with low EQs, and a single-point increase in your EQ adds $1,300 to your salary.”
Sounds impressive, doesn’t it? Being likable has its own benefits and incentives.
As we have discussed in our articles on handwriting analysis, your personality is expressed in your handwriting. For example, if you are friendly, your handwriting will definitely show it in the way you connect your letters. (To learn more on handwriting analysis, click here)
Likable people have several commendable personality traits and I have handpicked three of them below:
1. They come across as real & confident
Most of us are drawn towards people who are genuine. That’s because it instills in us a sense of security. We like them because we know deep down that they can be trusted. We all know it’s difficult to like someone when we don’t know who they are and what they think or feel.
Where to see that in handwriting: In graphology, there are many handwriting indicators that point to the writer’s genuineness. One of them is the relation between the script and the signature.
According to signature analysis, if the handwriting and signature look similar, you have someone who is real. Too many differences between the handwriting and the signature indicate that the person is not showing his real self. He is either withholding facts or not giving a clear picture of himself. (To learn more about signatures, read: Signatures And Their Hidden Meanings)
2. They leave a strong first impression
Those of you who have read Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice may know that the book was first called First Impressions. There is a reason Austen had thought of that name first. The entire book is based on the first impressions left upon each another by the two lead characters of the masterpiece.
In short, first impressions are crucial to any social bonding. According to a research, most people decide whether or not they like you within the first seven seconds of meeting you.
Where to see in handwriting: People who leave a lasting impression on others – good or bad – usually write a strong handwriting pressure. According to graphology, high handwriting pressure is indicative of the writer’s high energy, which he shows through his body language in general and a firm handshake in particular. Those who write with moderately high handwriting pressure invariably offer a firm handshake.
Please note whether the impression left is positive or negative will depend largely on other aspects of your personality, such as how well you connect with others after the initial meeting (shown by the connection between letters and spacing between words).
So, if you want to have a likable personality and leave a lasting impression, make sure your handshake is firm. Whoa… wait, super girl! You can’t crush the other person’s hand.
3. They’re not attention seekers
This is indeed a personality trait one should possess. For most people, an attention seeker is persona non grata because he tries to divert everyone’s attention to himself by doing quirky stuff or behaving in an eccentric manner. People are averse to those who are desperate for attention. I particularly find such people irritating and want to avoid them at all cost.
Where to see in handwriting: There could be many places where a handwriting may reflect the writer’s need for excessive attention. But the two key indicators are: huge signature size and a high-flying end stroke. A signature which is much larger than the script points to the writer’s desire to be the cynosure of any event. Movie actor Priyanka Chopra has that kind of large signature.
The other indicator is high-flying end stroke (see picture). Graphologist Fiona Young says: “The high-flying end stroke is a cry for attention. It’s like waving your arm in the air, saying ‘notice me, notice me’.”
4. They smile
We said only three things in the headline. But I’ll give you some bonus information.
You may be aware that smiling is the single-most common thing found among people who have an immensely likable personality. If you want people to like you, smile at them during a conversation and they will unconsciously return the favour.
But here is a caveat: If you always smile even without a reason, two things will happen – first, people will know you are an unadulterated fake and avoid you like the plague; and second, they will think you are a fool. As a result, instead of bonding with them, you will eventually drive them away.
In short, if you have a fake smile, wipe it off your face as soon as possible. Else, even the best of your personality traits won’t make you likable.