One day last month, I was getting late for work and was hurriedly tying shoe laces in the living room. My father was watching TV and mom was in the kitchen. Even as I was busy with the shoe strings, I looked up at the TV screen to see what he was watching so attentively. It was a serial, in which a middle-aged man was running on treadmill, while his 25-something daughter sat on a bench waiting for him to finish.
I looked at my father and said: “I fail to understand why people watch these foolish serials. Do they ever make sense?”
He smiled at me and said: “Just shut up and rush. You’re getting late.”
After the snub, I sat on the sofa for some time as I waited for my mother to come out of the kitchen with my lunch box. The story in the serial was progressing. I was also watching it now. The man on the treadmill climbed down and sternly gave the girl a long lecture on why she should get married as early as possible. “It’s necessary to get married for an honourable life. If you don’t get married, how will I face the society?”
The girl was adamant. She walked up to him, looked into his eyes and affirmed: “I am NOT marrying, dad.”
The old man looked taken aback. He turned back and headed towards the door. His daughter then shouted: “Dad!” He stopped. She resumed: “From which floor did mom jump off to commit suicide — 13th or 15th?”
“From 13th. Why?” he said.
“No, dad! She jumped off from the 12th floor. She was your wife for 10 years and you don’t remember which floor she jumped off from! And you are telling me why it’s necessary to get married! How ridiculous!”
Well… I left the room at that point in the episode. But the last few lines rang through my mind for some time. This portion of the serial definitely made sense. The girl was right.
Most people begin their married lives with hopes and dreams that could be summed up, to some extent, in the picture above. But often the fairy tale crumbles. Sometimes, it never even starts. It remains a dream, hidden in layers of the brain, recalled in the moments of sadness or introspection.
Apparently, the young girl in that serial was reluctant to marry because she had seen a failed relationship at home. Would she need a bigger reason to grow an aversion towards marriage? I doubt. Why would she want to get into a situation, which, she “knows”, will give her more pain than pleasure? Her fear was justified. Obviously, she did not want to do what her mom was forced to do.
The subsequent episodes of the television serial would have revealed how she handled the situation. I don’t know what happened next. However, I know and have also seen that what she dreaded so much in reel life is a part of many people’s real lives.
These days divorces are rife. Many people are living alone, their dreams shattered and their lives embittered. The cement that binds two people together seems to have turned into a third-grade cheap glue that easily comes unstuck. More and more relationships are failing and much of this failure is due to poor communication and conflicting ambitions and goals.
Last year, I met a housewife who was married for 12 years with a child. She told me she felt stuck in her marriage. Why? The woman summed up the whole marital problem in one line: “He hardly talks.”
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